Starting Over

What am I going to do today? It has been years since I did not have anything I needed to do. I am kind of lost. The funeral directer called and ask how many death certificate's I needed. I ask him what I needed them for. He said to get everything out of mom's name into mine. That sucks. I just want to leave everything the way it is. Not in the mood to do that. Don't want to clean her room. Don't want to get rid of her stuff. Don't want to do anything. Yesterday I went to Circle of Life Hospice. Where she passed away and got a brick in her name to be put on the sidewalk in her memory. We ask for donations in her name to be sent there instead of flowers and a lot of people just gave me checks . I had enough to get one for my dad and mom. It is so pretty there. They have a walkway lined with bricks of people who have passed away there and some in Honor of people. The money goes to Hospice to fund the wonderful work they do.
 My sister went to order the date to be put on the tombstone  yesterday that cost her $100. My brother paid the Chaplin $50 at the service. My son paid to have the grave dug. That was $400 dollars cash they wanted up front. I said will you take a credit card and the funeral guy said no it had to be cash. My 21yr old son wrote a check for that. That is sad. I had to borrow $400 dollars from my son. I need a life. It is time to go back to work.We have been paying for the service for years now so at least I had that taken care of. How do people afford a  funeral when they are not prepared for them. It cost so much. This not having anything to do is not what is it cracked up to be. I need a paycheck coming in and something to do.  I think I will make myself be lazy the rest of the week. Than Monday I will go check out the place I used to work. I know I need to rest but not really resting. My son is moving into a new apartment next week. And I will be really alone.
I need to tell you about my boyfriend. So not really alone but alone in the house. He is a friend from school who I run into from time to time around town. Well he came over a few months back just to check up on me . Than he called to ask me out . And now we are dating. It is nice . New but nice. I think without him this might of been a lot worse. Seems like I have him on my mind more than losing mom. I think if it was not for him keeping me busy when he is not working or at his home I would be a lot worse off. Thank the Lord for my wonderful family and friends new ones and old. That are keeping me sane.

In The Arms Of Jesus

Mom passed away yesterday Oct. 18th around 8:46am. It was a bit of a surprise I was not expecting it to happen so fast. And she just all of a sudden started breathing loudly and I thought she needed more pain meds. But the nurse said her heart beat was very faint and they could not get a blood pressure reading so she told me it would be soon. I called everyone to come but no on made it in time. My boyfriend was there with me so I was not alone. He is new but that is another story. Anyway I am very pleased at how peaceful she went. And I think the Lord for all he has done and the blessing's he has gave to use over the years. Thank you for all your thoughts and prayers.

It's Time For Mom To Go

Good Morning Bloggers, I have been thinking about this post for years. Now it is here and not sure what I want to write.
Mom is in Hospice she can't eat or drink without it going in her lungs. Her brain does not tell the flap that keeps food out of her lungs to close. Or it is just to weak to work anymore .  So when she eats she almost chokes to death. It is so hard to watch. So painful looking. We are giving her drinks "kind of " when she is thirsty but that is it.We kept feeding her up till yesterday morning and than we decided her choking was so much more painful than not eating. She is not asking for food. But when she would smack her lips we would give her applesauce or a milkshake. It was awful. And she really did not seem to want it like used to. But she enjoys cool water in her mouth and she sometimes will not open her mouth for that but when she does she seems to love it.
The doc gave me the pros and cons of feeding her and not feeding her. I can keep feeding her and she will get pneumonia  and than die or we can not feed her and she will dehydrate but she will just sleep a lot and than slip into a coma and than die peacefully . I can't stand the thought of her being thirsty but not feeding her is not bothering me so bad because she does not seem to want anything to eat. She is content it seems. Alzheimer's Sucks. Prayers Please and Lots Of Love To All.

I Am Ready For A Shot To Fix This Infection!!!!

In some cases, Alzheimer's disease may in fact be the result of an infection, and may even be transmissible, a new study in mice suggests.

1. Don't miss these Health stories
   1. 

      Getty Images
      Sneak in a smile to amp up your immunity
      Studies show that glass-half-empty types don't live as long as those who look on the bright side. But if you're not the happy type, what can you do?
   2. Cancer kiss-off: Getting dumped after diagnosis
   3. As farmers markets thrive, so do concerns
   4. Cancer spike in men tied to HPV from oral sex
   5. More parents think it's safer to delay vaccines

In the study, mice injected with human brain tissue from Alzheimer's patients developed Alzheimer's disease. The mice developed brain damage characteristic of Alzheimer's disease, and over time, the damage spread throughout their brains, the researchers said.
Mice injected with brain tissue from healthy humans showed no signs of the disease.
"Our findings open the possibility that some of the sporadic Alzheimer's cases may arise from an infectious process," similar to the way mad cow disease arises from infection with diseased proteins called prions, said study researcher Claudio Soto, a professor of neurology at The University of Texas Medical School at Houston.

1. MyHealthNewsDaily
   1. 
   2. Think You're in Good Health? Then Your Dementia Risk is Lower
   3. Steroid Injection May Prevent PTSD
   4. Ballard Designs Recalls Step Stools
   5. Prostate Cancer Deaths Drop, But Benefits of Screening Still Unclear

"The underlying mechanism of Alzheimer's disease is very similar to the prion diseases," Soto said. "It involves a normal protein that becomes misshapen, and is able to spread by transforming good proteins to bad ones. The bad proteins accumulate in the brain, forming plaque deposits that are believed to kill neuron cells in Alzheimer’s," he said.
However, the new findings are very preliminary and it's unclear if the same thing could happen in people. Moreover, the transmission occurred under highly artificial conditions that a person would likely not experience.
The researchers are currently setting up experiments to determine whether the same transmission can occur under more natural routes of exposure, Soto said.

Advertise | AdChoices

Advertise | AdChoices

Advertise | AdChoices

The study was published today (Oct. 4) in the journal Molecular Psychiatry.
Pass it on: Alzheimer's disease may be able to spread, similar to the way mad cow disease spreads, a study in animals suggests

Game Day!!!

Good Morning Bloggers!!! It is Saturday and I have been up since 4am. Oh the life of a caregiver. Mom and I both have colds and she coughed all night. The nurse was here yesterday and said it is not in her lungs only upper chest. That is good. I just have a runny nose. Hope she is better soon and I don't start coughing.
Today is Game Day . The Arkansas Razorbacks are playing at the Dallas Cowboy stadium today against Texas A&M.  It is a big deal. I hope we win . We lost to Alabama last week so we need this win. My son and his girlfriend left for Dallas yesterday after classes and staying over for the Cowboys game tomorrow . That will be fun. Maybe we will see them on tv.
A friend of mine is coming over after work to grill steaks today . Kind of looking forward to that and kind of not. It is hard to have company and care for mom. It is hard to watch football and care for mom. I have to either leave her in bed longer or get her up sooner or leave her up in her chair longer or not get her out of bed at all. Just so I don't miss any of the game. She does not have cable in her room and that makes it hard to watch the game and care for her in there if it is not on a local channel.
Sometimes I leave her in her chair till half time than put her to bed  to change her  if the game starts early. And if it is a late game I put her to bed early. But making sure she gets all her meals in is hard. I am just so unorganized. I fill bad if I put her bed early when she is wide awake. Than if she is in her chair I worry about pressure sores on her bottom. Worry, Worry, Worry. I have so many worry wrinkles. LOL!!!! Hope all your teams win today. Unless it is Texas A&M. LOL!!!!